on the contrast..

Thu, 24 Nov 2005 06:04:59 GMT

my love has loved another.

like spagetti on a spoon

Fri, 26 Aug 2005 04:05:55 GMT

6 year difference. he could tell and tell night after night, but there will be so much i never hear. 6 year difference, a child who can tie its shoes, ride it's bike, and it knows it's a b c's by heart. He's in the city right now. and thank heavens he's broke. or else he'd be in love. I'm feeling awfully greedy. Everyone is soon leaving-or allready has. I'm trying to soak up all that is ohio, all who is ohio, while i am still in ohio. my family will be moving to arizona at the drop of a hat. i have no reference to plan around. no time frame. i have to watch my breathing. i have to let my thoughts slip through my brain. i have to tell myself that nothing in this world is permanent.
aw shucks. =[

i can only thank everyone

Thu, 25 Aug 2005 04:24:49 GMT

i was in the restroom out back made of marbled plastic. i'd been in it so many times i had everything memorized. [odd..last night we talked about your friend who joined the volleyball team and couldn't hold it.] the lid would not slide out from under me the lid was rubbing upon my genitalia the lid was emerald green between my pasty hairy thick and flabby scab covered legs. i woke up and ran to the rest room. i took off my underwear and hid it beneath the sink. i went back to sleep. took the said boy to the airport so he can learn how to be a rock star and kiss himself a talented beautiful well known young lady. [that's just my jelousy with a bad day behind it]
Hung up clothes and gave adivce on how to apear hip and fashionable. cool and differant. drove a boy and his broken bicycle home. he said "yeah, i'm a scenester. that's such a cop out. look at my beautiful house, the one with the porch light. the huge one. you move in such an intresting way. i like how tall you are. i like your long face. i like your long legs. bohemeian like. i didn't mean to imbarrass you. i'll see you saturday" when i stepped out of the car to help him with his stack of empty boxes i had blood running down my legs building up behind my knees.
my case has been dropped. if you see ames--his has as well.
but children services doesn't trust my parents.

i'm begining to hear music for what it it.

Sat, 06 Aug 2005 18:33:50 GMT

good day thus far: 6:45 [am] alarm clock. 30 minute hug. 2 hours meditation. 44 minutes parking meter. $11.09 happy greek. 3 miles his hand on my gas-pedal leg. he leaves me with the shortest kiss. 2:25, 2:31, [pm] he calls me from the zombies show, so that i can listen as well.
:]

Sun, 31 Jul 2005 19:58:00 GMT

The filming is all complete. editing will hopefully take place soon. but i know nothing about editing. at all. we couldn't watch the footage, for the tapes were somewhere else. i got stoned with my boyfriends roomate. counted change for 7 hours. garlic and onion kings pizza. i laughed so hard my throat was bleeding. everything tasted so salty. he seemed so fucking gay. he took my pants off for me while i was sleeping. my face is horrific. my body is sore. my eyes are either shrinking or enlarging, i can not tell. the moral of the story is: don't look for me if you don't want to find me.

Tue, 19 Jul 2005 05:42:45 GMT

i feel like bragging:
his jaw structure is impeccable. the space hits his face like you wouldn't belive. he looks at me. his vocal cords make the most amazing noises. his hands really know how to bang the tabla. we hug for 30minutes. he discovered what pitch resonates in my tunnel. smells good. masterbates in the bathroom when need be!!! bought me two 45s! he shook his booty when blowfly sung me a song. he doesn't kill flys or spiders or any sort of insects. he respects life. he's won my love. god damn. he's so brilliant.

Tue, 19 Jul 2005 05:26:03 GMT

i'm so glad he eats doughnuts when he's sad.

urgent! urgent!

Mon, 11 Jul 2005 20:30:10 GMT

i need a coffin by the 30th!!!!

p.s. tunnel music is the best music of all music. i'm loving myself a boy. meghan is raving in canada[were shooting our film the 30th.. if we get a casket by then, we will need extras who can weep and ramble on about what a great gal she was and how unfortunate is is that she died so young for our funeral shot] i had a dream about lauren purje (incorrect spelling?) and i miss seeing all the hip worthington kids.

"would you like one of my french cigarettes?"

Wed, 15 Jun 2005 04:46:09 GMT

as to not forget i sketched out scenes a,g,m,r,z.

cop killa

Fri, 13 May 2005 19:02:32 GMT

i think (and i'm assured) that everything is going to be okay. i wasn't in the wrong. so, i shouldn't be punished... ?
court date: june 10. same day as my brother, same day as james.

pcyssssst

Fri, 29 Apr 2005 03:47:54 GMT

My love for my self is of immense proportions. <3the blood veins on my chest, the feeling of my fatty arse through the pockets of my jeans, what's on the opposite side of my eye-lids, my fingers secured between the knuckles of the other hand, the clumps of matted hair on the back of my head. i find ways to disquise///>hide my beauty i most adore in order to seek the adoration of others. what i receive is not what i desire, but rather a detached impersonal ego-boost. and what i desire--the elite of the crowd.who will return, tease me with his presence (completely unaware of mine) only to escape to germany as to expand his philosophical knowledge.
and that one man.. who wrote constantly about anything about everything/nothing he was right. is right.. it's not the money but the love for money that is the root of all evil. I was pulling weeds for my mother today, and i plucked a tulip from the ground.. i tried to replant it. but now it's falling over.. nearly touching the ground, i'm sure it will be dead by tomorrow. ..The rabbits are back. i thought that the end of the world was coming this time last year. there are so many rabbits here. noun and phil noun and phil. i'm wondering what everybody would say if they knew what i think of them.
maybe, i could grow to love my faulty vagina.
[i'm moving to arizona in january]

wait till you see my dick

Mon, 04 Apr 2005 04:06:32 GMT

my sore/poor back,caitlin <3's blueprint, buckethead has got the moves, schizophrenic nick thinks that somebody else is trying to kill him, iwill and his mad hip-hop/film industry creditials, kat the compulsive liar + hair dying extrodinare, josh rea, ryan still hasn't developed his film, john and robin + pumkin pie, my brother is back in town, my dad is back in town. my mom is still livin' it up in las vegas. my sister is a rat. + to those of you who aren't aware.. i have a tan.

Dear LJ

Mon, 31 Jan 2005 04:44:52 GMT

10 hours as SNS, bitches.

and, i'll tell you what..

Thu, 27 Jan 2005 03:27:56 GMT

beautiful,under the most brutal light. glowing,flowing,growing. the fingers will tremble from what the eyes reveal. oh. and you smile. my testimony,it's nothing legible, it's nothing real.

Sun, 16 Jan 2005 06:02:43 GMT

to my four ladies: i am madly in love with you.

you're so young.. you're so young...so young, so young. how strange! i end up on your side of town. on your door.. under a bridge, sparklers in hand, you by my side. and on the day, your special day...18 today. what's an hour next to two years.. when it takes so much courage to get up and leave.?

golden streets

Wed, 12 Jan 2005 03:41:29 GMT

the thought:has never crossed my mind>>>><that it would be nessicary to defend myself from friends.

ladies is pimps too.

Wed, 05 Jan 2005 03:14:06 GMT

decided: i will not finish my painting in one night just to please my art teacher.

i found a notebook today at work, filled with rantings on the human nature of questioning. i wrote/drew a little on the unused backsides of the paper. and then put it back where i found it. i think that i know who the journal belongs to.
+ i received a mix tape from the boy who i think wrote in the journal.
- my toilet flooded the hallway.

new years eve'

Sun, 02 Jan 2005 02:36:52 GMT

so...haha!!!
and then...hahaha!!!
like o m g ....hahahhaha!!!
Do you know charlie?
...
I really think you should meet charlie.

Wed, 29 Dec 2004 07:24:00 GMT

so blitzed.,...___
sucking face with a vomit coated mouth.

a deal

Mon, 27 Dec 2004 01:01:15 GMT

your story involves regurgitated excitement
your story came with ease
to you a young lady seemed such a simple escape
yet she granted no reprieve
your idle aversions further trap you in an exasperated storyline./

Mon, 20 Dec 2004 21:29:26 GMT

Instead of tossing your pine tree to the streets this year, realize the vast amounts of resources an xmas tree can provide...
The TRunk so sleek and slender makes for a perfect family totem pole..a new bed post, or the perfect set of skis. the needles make a great popurri, and with little work make that astro turf you've always dreamt of. Run out of glue/honey/lip gloss?? save up your sap!!

meghan graber

Mon, 20 Dec 2004 08:00:16 GMT

i mindlessly called your cell-phone at 230 am.
meghan graber i had 5 new voice-mails on my cellular phone today, but i didn't listen to a single one.
i left a 5 minute long message at your voice mailboxes command. there was nothing on the other end. i'm sure my efforts were fruitless.
meghan i lost your phone number.
meghan, i hate them anyway.
love,
nicole.

p.s. come taste miso soup that may very well be expired. come hear bjorks new album which may very well put you to sleep. come see patrick who you may very well fall in love with. come see my new car which you may very well mistake for yours. come see me becuase i don't take to missing you very well.

tdo

Mon, 15 Nov 2004 03:15:40 GMT

make tap-dancing shoes in woodshop
be mute for a day
make some new underwear
ruthless bitch day
guerrilla art
ridiculous road trip
hide from everybody day
bake a huuuuuuge cherry cake
leave a flaming bag of poop on a porch
paint my nails
grow my hair to my toes
make a play
dramatic break-up on cellular phone with meghan
(remeber the dream?..rent hotel and cover our bodies in paint and then press ourselvs against the walls.
canned food dinner party
aphrodisiac dinner party (poppy cock, spotted dick, nuts)
kiss 103 people in one day
i'll do whatever i please!

ah! opps! now youve done it buddy!

Sun, 07 Nov 2004 05:07:35 GMT

With temperatures this low you can bet that my knuckles are turning white around my own waist that my lips are splitting from my own tonuge and my cheeks are flushed with my own lack of preparation. i'm too wrapped up in myself to give a damn about you.

ladies! friendship drama! hellz yes! this is more exciting than the atomic make up of scent receptors in the nasal passages!!!! (seriously.)
lj notes:
meghan- your spirit is haunting my kitchen. she lingers above my pile of un-opened canned food. the bitch wont even dust!!
caitlin- you left my bed a mess. hey!did YOU open a can of Papaya Pineapple nectar and leave it in my fridge for me to grab at a later time... and shake?! coffee tomorow. crack-head style?!
maggan- you hang out with me. i'll bribe you to do so. you can have the worrld!

if i were a foxy blond teenage witch... i would make brains print recipts.

holy kamolie

Mon, 01 Nov 2004 04:27:21 GMT

did a portion of my brain get removed somehow last-night?
I'm sure this is only day-lights saving time syndrom. (it is currently riot-time)
So last night.. i can remeber a breif moment of flipping out in the bathroom. I can remeber a gay guy inspecting my crotch for putrid sents. I can remeber making a toast to science. I woke up in the morning to maggan tapping her fingers on a pillow by my feet, still feeling completely drunk. We went to sns .. and then i went to aarons house to sleep for 4 hours (and have another weird dream) When i stepped out of the bathtub this evening there was a dark ring where the water had been.
+ all this halloween hoopla is making me think that my house is haunted.